Tuesday, February 21, 2006

 

It's been a long time, I shouldn'ta left you, without a dope beat to step to...

Heyya. Been a bit. Thought I’d drop a bit of updating in this here spot. I can’t believe I neglected to mention it in the last post, but there was some very good news during our last visit to the doctor’s office, not our regular obgyn, but where we went for genetic counseling, and where we get the sonograms, well, anyway, couple weeks back we went in for what they call a fetal heart echo, it’s wherein they get some really good views of the ole ticker and see how it’s doing. Well, our lil darling, her heart is pumping and bumping away, and there are no signs (furious wood knocking) of any trouble. Even if there is some trouble, the doc says, it’s minor, meaning that if there was anything really really serious, like valves being connected to the wrong chambers or things like that, we’d know already. Ditto with the stomach and kidneys, all appear to be in perfect working order, at least at this stage.

We have another visit in a couple weeks, so hopefully things will be similar in the good news arena. The baby is kicking like crazy lately! She definitely wants to be here. That was one of the things my wife and I discussed the most, amid torrents of tears and fear and self doubt, during going back & forth about what to do, what if there were health problems, what if we brought this child into the world that had serious physical ailments and would resent that we ever brought her here to suffer?? Well, that does not (at least for now) seem to be the case. She is knocking on the door and appears to be anxious and eager to join us in this world whether the other kids and the world at large are going to be nice to her or not.

We told the family and everyone else that seemed to be required that we are having a girl. We have told no one yet of the down syndrome factor in the equation. We still have four months to go until the birth, estimated at June 9th at this juncture. Everyone is suitably excited, according to my master plan. Let them build emotional attachment, so that theoretically when they hear what will probably be at first very frightening and devastating news, they will already have invested themselves in this child and will be much less likely to write her off (not that, I hope in my heart, they ever would have anyway?? But you never know, even about your closest and most loved, until the chips come down, what will happen?) we keep reminding ourselves that when we do give the news to everyone, that we must be patient and non judgmental of people’s initial reaction, that the common perception of down syndrome and that of the potential of people with said condition is about a thousand degrees off base and that it is now our job to educate those around us, and our daughter’s future extended family, that she is, yes, going to be a little different, but still a child with unlimited possibilities and love to give and should be treated as such and given equal if not more love and caring and respect in return. Don’t take my daughter lightly, said Joe Malone, I guarantee she will surprise you in her capacity for things of which were never considered that she could do, he said with just the slightest bit of fear and trepidation and the largest amounts of hope and love and awe for the miracle of the creation of life.

Comments:
hi Joe,

You and your wife are really very brave and your daughter is very very very lucky to have you as parents. I don't know you, but just reading your story makes me proud to be part of the human race. I don't know what to say. I guess, I am just overwhelmed.
Good luck with everything.
 
What an exciting time for you guys!

When my brother was born, he had a hole in his heart (something which he still has 22 years later, although it has now gone way beyond the point of surgery, development of lungs etc under different blood pressure etc) and my parents were informed of his bleak chances. After a few hairy moments, things look to be fine for now (they have been touching would for 22 years I'm sure). What I'm trying to say is that sometimes stuff that is less than ideal happens, and sometimes it doesn't, and sometimes when it does happen, the worst doesn't always happen, but of course, sometimes it does. Life, as I'm sure you are all too aware, is the biggest rollercoaster there is.

Anyway, I'm so pleased to hear of the reassurance you have taken from the heart echo. I wish you guys all the best of luck with what is a truly amazing life-event, the birth of a daughter! WOW!

All the best,

Akira
 
Hey, I check in often, so update soon ok? And my dad's birthday was June 6th, I prefer that as your daughters birthdate if you could.
 
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